Dearest Michael~
My heart is afraid for all the unknowns that I face...how will I face each day without you in it? How will I keep this house? How can I help our children grieve when I don't even know how to help myself? How can I make a life for myself after being a part of yours for so long...
I try to be brave...I try to live in the moment and actually, thats a lot easier for me...though nothing new for me...I've always lived in the moment...not wanting to look back and never looking too far ahead...and I guess I will continue to do that, for in doing so, I can miss you only in small doses. Some moments are unbearable and then other times, so much easier than I thought. Today I was at Hingham Shipyard and I drove by the movie theatre just so I could invision you there...I remember when we went to see that movie filmed in Hull (can't remember the name) and Bev dropped me off at the theatre to meet you and there you were, standing against the pole and it was a beautiful winter afternoon and we sat on the bench for a few minutes before we went in...I had that visual today and it made me smile...You make me smile...I love you...
Forever love,
Karen
May we discover through pain and torment,
the strength to live with grace and humor.
May we discover through doubt and anguish,
the strength to live with dignity and holiness.
May we discover through suffering and fear,
the strength to move toward healing.
May it come to pass that we be restored to health and to vigor.
May Life grant us wellness of body, spirit, and mind.
And if this cannot be so, may we find in this transformation and passage
moments of meaning, opportunities for love
and the deep and gracious calm that comes
when we allow ourselves to move on.
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